Oscar and the monster truck, Evelyn and her dolphin

I can’t believe it. Oscar’s favourite things in the world are cars, trucks, trains and especially … monster trucks. How did I manage to fail him so badly? :/

I don’t know what it is about the brain of a boy, but there is some sort of irresistible draw to things with wheels (at least for Oscar). Evelyn is interested in cars as well, but only about as interested as anything else. She asked me for a car and I bought a 3 pack of hotwheels and let her have the first choice (Oscar got the other two and they have been lost and found in various places in the house over the past few months including the pantry, under the couch and in Oscar’s bed). At first Evelyn jealously guarded her car (like anything new), now she could care less about it. Oscar, on the other hand, learned the names and sounds of vehicles well before other things (like colours, animals or letters for that matter) and has always been interested in things that move.

It’s a tough thing to manage … on one hand I want to get him interested in all the other wonderful things in the world but on the other hand we can’t refuse to show an interest in what he loves either. Our path has been to acknowledge his interest in trains and cars but not actively promote it. So yes, while Oscar will keep a collection of various wheeled things with him at all times (some of which others have given him as gifts – including a “monster truck” – and others which were part of toy sets) we also bought him a soft toy fox for Christmas. He didn’t show too much interest in it and still doesn’t seem to “care” about it, but it will still be his. Hopefully one day he will be able to make up stories that involve Mr. Fox, cars and other toys too.

**Breaking news … as I write this post, Oscar broke his monster truck toy. I had to take it away to avoid him hurting himself with it (darn it all!). It was also another opportunity to explain the difference between well made things and poorly made things, at least. Oscar was sad but he’s not attached on a soul-mate level with any of his toys (like Evelyn), so he will be fine. He’s already moved on, 5 minutes later.

In the meantime, we try to expose him to positive boy role models who show compassion, love, caring and intelligence as well as an interest in the world around then. Oliver Jeffer’s books have been particularly great in this aspect, as is Harold from the original Harold and the Purple Crayon. Oscar notices boys in the kids books and knows he is one too, so he observes them very closely. He also asks after his uncles, male cousins and grandfathers more often than female family members and he adores his dad.

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Evelyn and I had an interesting experience recently. We were shopping for groceries in the nearby grocery store when Evelyn discovered the bin of Beanie babies (or whatever toys they sell in grocery stores these days). She somehow found a plush dolphin among all the animals. Evelyn loves sea animals, ever since the first day she decided she loved Little Whale. We thought we lost LW in the park one day (he was hidden in the front closet) and Evelyn said to me that if we couldn’t find him that she would like to have a “soft toy dolphin” someday. Which was a good thing since we tried to find an exact replacement for LW everywhere and have never found one. So when we ordered the kid’s toys this Christmas, we bought a dolphin as well. We decided to keep it for a future emergency with LW (either him getting lost or so worn out that the stuffing started to come out) and kept him in the closet.

So back to the grocery store … I explained to E that it was a nice dolphin but we were not getting that particular one and that choosing a toy is a big decision. I told her that she should look at lots of other ones like it before choosing that one. Of course none of this helped the situation at all, and she ended up sitting on the ground in the checkout line with tears rolling down her face. I mentioned at one point that she could buy her own toys when she received an allowance. By chance, Evelyn had found a penny on the ground earlier that day and told me in a firm voice that she would “save up the penny so that she could buy a dolphin of her own”.

Two things came of this. First, when we got home I gave her the toy dolphin that we were keeping and she absolutely loves it. Second, I think she might be ready for an allowance. We will have to give it a try. I’m thinking something small like $2 a week which she can either save or spend on anything she wants (no, that’s a total lie – not anything, but anything we don’t completely disapprove of).